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Growing up in God's Little Acre

My single again years - things I have learned and should have learned

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My life after Marriage

I will keep my personal life personal so I guess this page will be about "Things I have learned good and bad."   I will also  give a bit of advise.  

The first thing I learned and learned quickly was that the pasture is NOT greener on the other side and that you have to kiss a lot of horny toads before meeting the handsome prince and even then you may never meet him.  First bit of advice is to try, try and try to make your marriage work...divorce is so ugly and it affects and hurts so many lives especially children, some of which are hurt forever. 

I also learned that loneliness can cause mistakes and poor judgement.  Yep, I made a lot of them.

One of the most hurting things I learned is that the mistakes you make in life are never forgotten or forgiven.  One mistake will over shadow all the sacrafices and all the good you did through the years. 

I would advise Moms to stay at home with their babies.  It's no wonder the kids are getting into so much trouble....having a stranger raise them.  If you don't want to raise them don't have is not fair to the children.

 Another thing I learned is that being single (divorced) has a stigma.  Women think of you as a threat.....their husbands think of you as a threat also.  Your whole life is different and the comptetion for someone to share your life with is fierce. 

Another thing I learned while single is that most women and few men are loyal...they have the attitude that everything is fair in love and war.  So much game playing.

When single even with family events you are the odd person.  It seems everything is for couples.  Going out to eat alone is very depressing....and coming home alone is even worse.  I didn't like coming home to an empty house...the insecurity and  quietness was over whelming.

There were lots of good times but the reality of being alone would always creep in.  I loved laughter, dancing, swimming, good conversation and telling funny jokes but all that is only fun when you share it.  My single life wasn't too bad until my sons left home and the loneliness really began to set in....I still miss my sons so much....I can hear their laughter now...they had such a good sense of humor.  They would wake me laughing so hard ,especially when watching SNL.

If you are looking for someone to share your life with it helps if you have money and if you are a good cook.  I learned that men like energized women (a nice word for maid).hehe  You will not believe the difference in men when saying you are widowed (they see dollar signs) verses saying you are divorced with children.  WOW!!!

I remember how often fashions changed...hem lenghts seemed to change every season.  In my day it was never proper to wear your blouse outside your skirt.  When mini skirts were in style you sat with your legs closed like a lady.   Business ladies were to wear attire that had sleeves with high heels. 

I remember my first two piece bathing suit....I wore a wrap to the water before disrobing.  I had become too old for swim wear when the bikini came, that would have been a site to behold.  I am still shocked at the fashions of seems anything goes.

Men with body hair were sexy.  I can't get used to men with no body hair.  Yes, I liked bald men.

We were taught that you never wear plaids with stripes...if you wore a plaid shirt you would wear a solid colored skirt and vise versa.  Colors were always worn with blends...not contrast.  Well, we know that is no longer the case.

The way the young people dance is another shock to me.  Rap dancing was so hard to get used to but I am beginning to like it.  All the dances we did were steps that required fast movements of the feet unless you were doing the two step. 

This is to be continued cus I am still learning.


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